The Passport Ordeal

A few weeks ago I got the bright idea that I needed to get a passport for Noah. We don't have any trips planned with him where we would need one but with David leaving the country nearly every week for work and Stacy living in Canada at the moment, you never know when a last minute trip may pop up where I would need a passport or some ID at least for Noah. I figured it would be easier to get it taken care of now than in the hustle of actually planning an international trip. Boy was I wrong. You couldn't pay me to do that again. I don't know if any of you have ever successfully gotten an approved passport picture for your toddler or not but if you have, all I'm gonna say is your child must be better behaved than mine...or you must have a sweet, well behaved GIRL and not a rambunctious boy who can't sit still for a second even if his life depended on it. And his life very nearly DID depend on it because I very nearly strangled him before this process was over...

I really thought this would be an easy process--pick up a form and fill it out, swing by CVS to get a passport photo then off to the post office to turn the form in. Ha! The form part was fairly easy but I was told when I picked it up that I would need to make an appointment to actually turn it in. I thought that was a little odd but I was glad I found out before I just showed up. I then found out that both David AND myself would have to be present, which does make sense, but with him traveling all the time it was a bit inconvenient. So then I had to go back and get the form for him to sign giving me permission to get Noah's passport and of course the form had to be notarized, but still..not too big of an ordeal. After doing some thinking I decided it may be easier to take Noah to a "real" photo studio for his picture rather than relying on some 19 year old at a busy Walgreen's who has never worked with young children before. So, I went to the local camera shop where they have an attached photo studio. Their passport pictures cost the same and I figured they HAD to have more experience with toddlers....Well, the 19 year old "photographer" (how ironic) at this store hadn't a clue how to deal with a toddler and managed to miss several good opportunities to take Noah's picture because he was fumbling around with his camera and completely missed the point that timing was crucial and hard to come by with one Noah's age. He then scared Noah, made him cry and Noah then would have nothing to do with the camera. Because of the strict passport picture regulations I couldn't hold him or anything. He had to be standing or sitting in front of an all-white background. By the time the "teenager" was ready again, Noah was traumatized and screaming and running wild through the store. He wouldn't go near the camera. With all the customers in the store starting to stare at us I just scooped up Noah and sneaked out feeling completely embarrassed and defeated. I then found a "great" website that said I could take his picture in the comfort of my home, upload it to their site and they would check to see if the photo met US passport approval and then mail me passport photos for only $5. I thought this was my saving grace. I spent all day trying to get the perfect picture on our only all-white wall. I finally got one where he was even looking straight at the camera and smiling only to be told by this website that the picture would be rejected because you aren't allow to smile in a passport photo! What??!! After reading the fine print that this rule is waived for babies and toddlers I decided to order the pictures anyway. They came from Europe which had me worried but they finally arrived and I was ready to make my "appointment" at the post office.

I had my appointment for this morning at 10:30. I gathered up the forms, the notarized forms, Noah's birth certificate and the pictures that I was so relieved to have. I arrived for my appointment (15 minutes early thank Goodness) and discovered I shouldn't have been filling out the forms while helping Noah build a legos tower because I had inadvertently signed on the line which clearly states "Do not sign here until told to do so by Passport Representative or your form will be rejected". Oops. So, after some disapproving looks from the postal worker, I quickly transferred all the info to a new form and Noah and I were taken into the "passport room" for the process. The nice postal worker went through all the papers, my ID, Noah's birth certificate, etc and did all the preliminary work. I even paid for everything and raised my right hand and took the "passport oath" on Noah's behalf. When I handed her my photos she said "I hope you didn't pay for these because these won't work at all". My mouth dropped. I asked why, because I had carefully measured the head to chin distance (has to be a certain length) and checked it against all the picture regulations posted on the website. Her reason was that because the way the picture was printed, she felt that the color of Noah's skin tone wasn't an exact match. She said the photo printer made it seem like his skin had slightly too much "orange" in it. While that may be the case, he CLEARLY looked Caucasian (with his pale skin, blue eyes and red hair...hello!) so I really don't think that any border officials would stop me and say "Excuse me Mrs. Nelson, but this can't be your son because your son's skin should be more orange according to his passport picture..." So, I just sighed and very nearly laughed aloud when she said "Don't worry, we'll just get his picture here..." Yeah right.

I don't even have to give all the details but suffice it to say it was a disaster. Once again Noah was terrified to have to sit on this big metal stool in front of the white backdrop, the postal worker couldn't figure out the camera, managed to miss several opportunities and even deleted the one good picture she got. Noah was crying the whole time, jumping off the stool, running around the room, taking off his socks and shoes and throwing them at me, messing with the computer, pulling up the blinds and making faces at the other patient people waiting in line for their passport (since by this time we had spilled over into 2 more time slots and were completely holding up the line). She even called in reinforcement and this second lovely woman ALSO managed to delete the one good picture we had. We even tried strapping him into his stroller to avoid the metal stool but then we couldn't get the white sheet to completely cover the stroller straps so that "wouldn't be acceptable for US passport requirements". I think whoever came up with these stringent photo requirements for children must NOT actually have any! The picture they decided on was just plain terrible. He was screaming, eyes were squinted, he's looking away from the camera and I think he is clutching a spoon in his hand. Somehow this is supposed to be "a more aceptable passport picture" than the one I brought where he is sitting straight up, perfectly centered, eyes wide open/looking straight ahead and smiling. The best part was in the end when they asked me how soon we were traveling so they would know if they needed to expedite the passport. I told them we weren't going anywhere, I just wanted him to have a passport. You should have seen the evil look they gave me as if to say "then why the **&$#* are you putting us through all this hard work?!" The ladies escorted me out while apologizing to everyone else in the line. They managed to mention, several times, that Noah was the toughest toddler they'd ever tried to photograph. Thanks. I gathered that. I wanted to add that if they're going to charge $15 for passport pictures perhaps they should take a class or 2 in how to actually work a camera and how to take photos of scared children. But, I refrained.

Noah was so desperate to get out of this place he actually climbed into his stroller by himself and strapped himself in (and he usually hates to sit in the stroller!) All that misbehaving must have been exhausting for Noah because 2 minutes after getting him into the car he, very wisely, fell sound asleep. He knows it is impossible for any human to be mad at an adorable sleeping child..with that halo over the head and all.

Fun at the lake

Most summer holiday weekends (and any other free weekends for that matter) David and I have always gone up to Lake Lanier for fun, relaxing, boating, jet skiing and good times with our dear friends Josh & Sheila at Sheila's parents' beautiful lake home. They treat us like family (Sheila's parents are our "sparents") and there is no place we'd rather be on a gorgeous summer weekend. The days up there are spent waking up to drink coffee on the deck overlooking the water, grilling out wonderful food, enjoying the amazing vegetables from Nancy's delicious garden, boating, jet- skiing and sitting around the fire at night talking til the late, late hours. This past weekend (Memorial Day weekend) was our first trip up there with a mobile Noah. Last summer we managed to skate by with him not learning to crawl or get around until after lake season was over. As much as I was looking forward to this weekend, I was a bit apprehensive about chasing a 19 month old (rather rambunctious) toddler around a body of water and a dock. Noah had the time of his life. Between the enormous yard to run around and play on (we have NO yard at our house), all the outdoor toys, the other 2 little boys to play with (Josh & Sheila's precious boys, Patrik & Andrew are our God-children), the dog, the cat and most importantly the LAKE! We have never seen Noah play so hard. (He sure did sleep great while we were there). I was still very nervous with him around the water but we kept his life jacket on at all times. I actually felt less nervous when David took him out on our wave runner with him (very slowly, just around the cove--stop worrying, Grandma!)than when he was running around near the dock. At least he was contained on the wave runner!
The weekend wasn't quite as relaxing as they used to be pre-Noah, but it was still a ton of fun. David and I took turns "chasing" him while he played so we each could have a few minutes of peace. David kept asking me "Are you sure you're having fun?" and my answer was always "I'm having as much fun as a worried mom can have with her toddler running around at a lake for the first time!" While the weekend at the lake may not have been quite as relaxing as it used to be when we went with no kids, the joy of watching Noah have such a blast was far more fulfilling.


Beep, Beep! I've got places to go!



"MOM, why do I have to wear this thing in the yard too?!"



Daddy and Noah ride the wave-runner



The boat--best place for a nap!



Noah is contemplating how fast he can run to the lake!


I'm glad I didn't have to hose Patrik off



Andrew is hamming ut up for the camera



Andrew and Patrik showing Noah some love

Birthday Surprises

It's been a few days since I have posted a blog entry. I've been busy soaking up all the birthday surprises David had in store for me. My birthday was this past Monday but the surprises started 2 days before on Saturday night, which disproves my theory that David waits til the last minute to plan for holidays/birthdays. (Sorry, honey, I was wrong). We came back from a bar-b-que at a friend's house and when I walked in the door I was quite startled to see my parents standing in my living room. He had arranged for them to be there to surprise me. I was in shock to see them and Noah was so thrilled and immediately said "Papa!!!" The surprises continued as the following evening I prepared the house to host our weekly bible study only to find out that they were there to surprise me for my birthday instead. We had a delicious grilled dinner (compliments to Chef David) and Noah thoroughly enjoyed the birthday cake. I was a little embarrassed but it was cute--he went around to every one's plates begging for food and stealing cake right off of their forks. The sweet tooth has finally set in. David's mom was also able to be there so Noah got to be spoiled by BOTH Grandmas for a little while. :) The birthday rounded out on Monday with a lovely dinner at Ray's on the River (yummy!) and David had arranged for 4 very dear friends of mine to be there as a nice little surprise and that was wonderful. So, it was definitely a birthday full of surprises and I have a very thoughtful hubby to thank.
David had to fly out to Mexico early the next morning, as usual, but with my parents here this week I had an extra treat since I didn't have to be by myself while he was gone. It turned out to be very fortunate for me (not so much for them) as we had horrible tornado scares that night and spend much of the evening in the basement glued to the weather reports. I was so grateful to not be alone during that scare!
Noah, as usual, thoroughly enjoyed Grandma and Papa being here and I was able to get some cute pictures of him with them.

TGIF

I've realized I enjoy being s SAHM (Stay-at home mom) on Mondays and Tuesdays a lot more than Thursdays and Fridays. In the beginning of each week I've had a little bit of a break from Noah with David being home to entertain him over the weekend; I start the day out on Mondays with Noah at his weekly play-group which is always adorable (and usually no one suffers too terribly much from the normal toddler group lack of sharing, the hitting, tantrums, etc), I have plans of what I'm going to cook each night for dinner, I had ideas of going to the library and doing all these constructive play things with Noah, etc etc. By the end of the week I'm in survival mode and counting down the minutes til David gets home because I think I just can't build one more block tower or watch one more second of PBS without screaming of boredom. Today was definitely one of those days. I had to wrangle both the kid and the cat into the car at the same time early this morning for a trip to the vet. Naturally the cat has ESP and knew what was coming (I really think she hears me make the appt on the phone) and was hiding. I had to distract Noah (he completely terrifies her) and move some furniture around to corral her into one room. After much chasing and screeching I was able to catch her and get her into the car but not without her hissing at me and then peeing on me. That was nice. I had already taken my shower for the day. After the vet fiasco was over I knew I had to figure out a way to get another shower (I had a MD appointment today and certainly couldn't go in smelling like cat pee) but a shower with an unattended toddler roaming around the house or my bedroom is always a challenge. I have perfected the 3-minute shower--my rational being "what can he possibly get in to in only 3 minutes that could be *that* bad after all?" Obviously this rational has been proved wrong time after time. It really is amazing what these little mischievous munchkins can do in 3 just minutes! But that is a whole different blog entry for another day!
And, like every week, just when I thought I was going to pull my hair out, the rescuer came home today and all I could hear was "Daddy! Daddy! Daddy!" and the pitter patter of feet running across the house to his open arms. It's such a sweet scene to watch that I almost immediately forget how frustrated I was with him just a few minutes earlier...well after the glass of wine kicks in! ha ha.

Name your auction price

Hopefully all the moms everywhere had a wonderful Mother's Day. While I didn't get to sleep in (why do kids wake up at daybreak every single day?) I did get a wonderful breakfast in bed and David even went out on a limb and prepared something he had never made (french toast) and it was very yummy. Luckily, I wrote my Mother's Day blog entry *before* my Mother's Day "nice" dinner out, otherwise it wouldn't have been so mushy and all "how wonderful it is to be a mom..." ha ha. We had reservations for Mother's Day dinner with David's parents and Grandma Ginny at a nice restaurant that I had been really wanting to try. We planned it around Noah's nap time so he would be "at his best". Uh huh. Let's just say that he apparently wanted to "dine in" at home that evening. While he enjoyed eating bites of my Filet Mignon (the boy has some expensive taste) he didn't exactly seem to care for the ambiance of the restaurant. David allowed me to inhale my food first (ladies first) but by that time, David had already been outside with him once, we had picked up over 200 pieces of food/toys/spoons off the floor, we had picked *him* up off the floor following a tantrum and we narrowly prevented him from colliding into the lap of a neighboring customer. Needless to say I spent the remainder of the dinner sitting in the car with him while everyone else finished. He was perfectly content in the car. Had a grand time, singing, laughing, playing. Good for him. :) I know he was just "being his age" but he is usually better behaved in restaurants (he likes the food too much to not be). Oh well. I felt slightly guilty for spending the dinner wishing I had gotten a babysitter...on Mother's Day...how wrong that would have seemed...but oh so tempting. I had to go back and re-read that "Before i was a Mom" poem I previously posted so I didn't auction him off to the highest bidder at the restaurant. Oh and did I mention...not once did my precious offspring refer to me as "ma-ma", "mom" or "mommy" today of all days. He called me "daddy" all day. Well that figures. All is forgiven though and everything is back to normal.

Noah and I had a fun day today. He actually took two naps so "treat" for me. He sure can play hard. Here are a few pictures from last week and also from tonight. He "got away" from me when I was in the middle of putting his pj's on tonight so I got some cute "diaper only" pictures. (he is in the habit of wearing clothes...just not tonight). I did photo collages to fit more pictures in...but the blog won't let me post them any larger so you can't really see any of the detail. Just click on each collage to see it bigger if you wish.


I keep telling him how hard it is to walk in MY shoes...



Yes, EACH meal is this messy for any of you who have not yet had kids!



It's all in the way you wear the hat!
Look at that belly! Actually, he is a little on the under-weight side and has absolutely no belly at all--you can see every rib, every bone down his spine, etc. I can't get any pants or shorts to fit him because they all fall right off. So I'm not at all sure what he is doing to get his belly to stick out like that but I've never seen it do that.



Now I'm sure we've all opened our front door a little under-dressed before...
And turned our back to an annoying solicitor

Happy Mother's Day

It may only be my second Mother's Day but I couldn't help but look back at some of these photos from when Noah was first born. His hands and feet were so tiny. He was so small and helpless. It was an instant love so strong I knew without a doubt I would do anything in my power to protect him. I had become a "mama bear", that's for sure. As of today at 4:53 pm, I have been a mom for exactly 19 months which I know is such a short span in the life of so many wonderful, expert, seasoned moms out there. I know I am so lucky as I learned from the best, as I truly believe I have the most amazing mom on the planet. It wasn't until during these last 19 months that I realized all she did/does to sacrifice herself for the well-being of her children. Before I became a mom I had no idea how much I could possibly love another human being. I had no idea at all how much my heart could hold. Sure, I had experienced wonderful love before...but never like this. I was so nervous about becoming a mom and questioned whether I would know what to do, whether I would truly enjoy it and whether I could handle all the responsibility and sacrifice. It truly has been the most amazing journey and when I think about all I have learned about myself, about love and about the world in just 19 months (and 2 Mother's Days), I can't wait to experience many, many more years of being a mom, learning and growing. Both last Mother's Day and this one, I received this email from many different people of a poem about being a mom and I read it each time. Most everyone has probably already read it but I think it says it all so I wanted to share it in my blog:

Before I was A Mom

Before I was a Mom I made and ate hot meals.

I had unstained clothing.

I had quiet conversations on the phone.

Before I was a Mom I slept as late as I wanted.

And never worried about how late I got into bed.

I brushed my hair and my teeth everyday.

Before I was Mom I cleaned my house each day.

I never tripped over toys or forgot words to lullabies.

Before I was a Mom I didn't worry whether or not my plants were poisonous.

I never thought about immunizations.

Before I was a Mom I had never been puked on, pooped on, spit on, peed on,or pinched by tiny fingers.

Before I was a Mom I had complete control of my mind, my thoughts, my bodyand all my feelings.

I slept all night.

Before I was a Mom I never held down a screaming child so that doctors could do tests or give shots.

I never looked into teary eyes and cried.

I never got gloriously happy over a simple grin.

I never sat up late hours at night watching a baby sleep.

Before I was a Mom I never held a sleeping baby just because I didn't want to put it down.

I never felt my heart break into a million pieces when I couldn't stop the hurt.

I never knew that something so small could affect my life so much.

I never knew that I could love someone so much.

I never knew I would love being a Mom.

Before I was a Mom I didn't know the feeling of having my heart outside my body.

I didn't know how special it could feel to feed a hungry baby.

I didn't know that bond between a Mother and her child.

I didn't know that something so small could make me feel so important.

Before I was a Mom I had never gotten up in the middle of the night every 10 minutes to make sure all was OK.

I had never known the warmth, the joy, the love, the heartache or the satisfaction of being a Mom.

I didn't know I was capable of feeling so much............before I was a Mom.

Author Unknown

Speeding ticket and mud pies...what a day!

Well, I eventually made it down to Gainesville to my parents’ house. The trip started off a bit rough. Not being a morning person…at all (even Noah knows this about me)..I dutifully set my alarm clock for the horrific time of 5:30a.m. so I could beat the famous Atlanta morning rush hour traffic and get on the road bright and early. I wanted to be in Gainesville by lunch time to see one of my best friends who had Monday off from work. That plan backfired. Traffic was ironically so light that early in the morning that I actually managed to get a speeding ticket not 10 miles from home. Yep…it takes talent to get a speeding ticket on I-285 in morning rush hour in Atlanta since everyone who lives here knows that the speed limit on that crazy interstate is merely a suggestion and if you actually drive 55mph you will get immediately mowed over by the cars going 90mph all around you. (OK, I was NOT driving 90) I’ve never even seen anyone getting a ticket on 285…but anyway, I know I shouldn’t have been speeding and the polite police officer was just doing his job. But, it certainly put a damper on my day and on my trip. Luckily I had only had one ticket before that and it was over 10 years ago…but I hate that my “cushion” is gone. Perhaps it will be more than 10 years before this happens again...or maybe never….even better.

Noah was happy to see me and actually looked me straight in the eyes and said “mommy” very clearly (not Ma-ma, Da-da, Daddy, etc). I was ecstatic. That was short- lived since in the 24 hours since then he has called me “Daddy” approximately 452 times. This is especially frustrating when David isn’t even here with us! I know it is his favorite word…but enough already :) I would like to at least be acknowledged by him occasionally that he realizes who it is that sacrifices everything to care for him all day long. Of course he calls me “Ma-ma” when he is sick or hurt but no other time. And I know it has nothing to do with his language development. Just in the last 2 weeks he has learned to say many new words, such as “Thank you”, “bye-bye”, “circle”, “ball”, “banana”, “Good job”, and several more. Maybe for my mother’s day present, David can teach him to finally start calling me Mommy. That would be much appreciated…hint, hint.

We had fun playing in the backyard with “Papa” today and Noah didn’t even destroy any of the tomato plants. I was relieved. He did play with the dirt a lot. I have come a long way from my germ-phobic tendencies and I didn’t even gasp or freak out when he smeared dirt all in and around his mouth. Mud pie anyone?

And then there was one...

The house is so quiet you could hear a pin drop. There is no crying, no whining (from Noah either), no theme songs from Clifford/Sesame Street/Curious George, no annoying electronic toys going off every time I step on one of them and no static from the baby monitor constantly interfering with my Blackberry phone. No, I’m not sitting in my backyard with earplugs in trying to pretend I’m on an island somewhere. I’m actually without-husband and without-child for, I think, the first time ever. After our not-so-relaxing vacation, my parents (who can easily be mistaken for modern day Saints) offered to take care of Noah for a few days (as if I really had to twist their arm). It just so happened that when David got back from his weekly, exhausting 2-day trip to Mexico City, he had to turn around and go to South Georgia for another trip the next day. “Oh honey, you don’t want to fly down to Valdosta do you? You want to drive with Noah and drop him off with my parents, don’t you?” Bless his heart he agreed. So not only do I get the free time, but I didn’t even have to do the driving. Now that’s a deal. Everyone knows I HATE to drive. I can’t sleep a wink at night in my own bed but the second I get behind the wheel I go from insomnia to narcolepsy. The trip went well and as you can see from the picture, Noah slept for part of it, luckily. I’m not sure how he found that position in his car seat comfortable though. My parents drove up from Gainesville and met David in Valdosta (at the Outlet mall of course) to collect Noah, who was thrilled to see them. David is spending the night in Valdosta then will be home Friday afternoon where we will be child-free til Monday.

I’ve been kind of at a loss for what to do. I had made a list of all the things I wanted to get done around the house while Noah was gone, but then I realized I would need to prioritize since Noah would have to visit with them until next Easter (not next Monday) if I wanted to accomplish all of that. Plus of course, there’s the fun things like going shopping somewhere other than Target and Publix, getting my hair cut, having lunch with friends, taking bubble baths, having “date nights” with David., etc. That’s a lot to fit in 3-4 days but I sure am going to try. I spent part of today watching a soap opera and taking a nap so I did feel kinda like a couch potato, but it was a nice way to spend part of an afternoon. I also already went shopping and bought some (much needed and with husband permission) new shoes which was a ton of fun. I haven’t gone shoe shopping since before Noah was born! And I did it all wearing makeup, dangle earrings, a delicate necklace and carrying a very cute, non-mom (couldn’t possibly be confused with a diaper bag) purse. All things I can’t wear with a 1-year old. It did feel GOOD.
Now if only I weren’t so darn lonely!